Habits I’ve Picked Up From New Hampshire

The problem with blogging from New Hampshire is that I've been so busy doing things that the idea of sitting down and writing about them is absurd. I'm so far behind that when something big does happen I don't want to just write about that because I'll be leaving everything else out. I can't write about climbing Mt Monadnock because that won't include the wild blueberries on other mountains or how towns on the coast look exactly like I imagined New England coastal towns to look or the sixty pounds of strawberries we picked and ate or the glassblowing lessons I took or the nights when the windows were open and the lilacs were blooming and the house smelled like heaven or the eighteen basil plants that are determined to fill our freezer with pesto.

And so I've given up trying to fit everything in. If any of the previously mentioned topics are particularly intriguing, I suppose Kim or I would bow to the demands of the readers and elaborate. Instead of trying to fit the summer into a single blog post, just assume we've been enjoying it (swimming, hiking, canoeing, using our new ice cream maker).

Living in New England is most definitely different than living in the midwest. The start with, I actually live in a region with history and some sort of culture, but living anywhere with different terrain and weather will force you to change the way you live. Of course I've picked up new habits to cope with the changes. I consider them all neutral or beneficial while in NH, but I've realized that there's a few that I will need to leave behind the next time I visit the midwest. Here they are:


Habit 1: Crossing the road

When I first learned how to drive my mother taught me the concept that "Pedestrians have the right of way.” Is this a country-wide thing? Is it just the midwest? Just rural areas? Just Fairfield? Just my mother? Well, either way, stop for just a moment to consider what this actually means when you drive. Unless, of course, you have no clue what I’m talking about. Then I think you’re destined to be amused by me making this into a big deal.

Imagine you’re driving and there’s a crosswalk up ahead. It’s one of those no-stop-sign crosswalks in the middle of a block. What do you do if there’s someone waiting to cross? What if there’s someone already crossing the street in it and you have to brake to avoid hitting them? How do you feel?

In Iowa I kept driving in the first instance and was thoroughly peeved by the pedestrian’s inability to look both ways in the second case. I always thought that pedestrian right of way simply meant that hitting the pedestrian was a bad idea. Granted, sometimes at a stop sign I would wave the pedestrian across and feel very polite and gallant about the whole interaction, but never would I stop mid-block to let someone cross.

Here driving like that makes you, as a friend put it, “An illegal jerk.” Here if a pedestrian is standing at the edge of a marked crosswalk (without lights) clearly indicating their intent to cross the road, the driver is legally bound to stop. It's like whenever a pedestrian wants to cross a crosswalk they put up an invisible red light. It’s made me a more aware driver, but a way more entitled pedestrian.

I fear for the honking I’ll get next time I’m in the midwest.

Habit 2: Drinking water out of the bathroom faucet

No comment. Except that it's the same water everyone drinks in the kitchen. And it's delicious.


Habit 3: Giving up on trying to have a mental map when driving

I feel like most of these bad habits are for the amusement of our midwest readers. This is the case because certain aspects of living in New Hampshire contrast so strongly with living in the midwest. This one’s for you, midwest readers.

This is what Peterborough’s downtown looks like according to google maps:

Yes, the roads seem to be trying to follow both the river and the buildings

This is what my hometown's downtown looks like according to google maps:

The official downtown is the green square in the middle

I think that's made my point pretty well...

Luckily Peterborough is small and I rely on memory and a small amount of trial and error to find places (and keep losing the public library for some reason). Unfortunately, everywhere else is similarly lacking in the straight-roads-that-intersect-at-right-angles department.


Habit 4: Expecting summer to be a usable season

I'm not actually sure this is so much of a bad habit as much as it is an expectation that will get me in trouble if I visit Iowa during July. I grew up expecting summer to be hot, and there to be a few week-long stints of heat where the nights were steamy and days were spent in the air conditioning. Summer weather was something to be endured rather than enjoyed.

Summer here had a few days where the nights didn't cool down and the thermometer hit 90, but no more than seven. Most days were followed by cool nights. I lived without air conditioning. I hiked mountains in July.

But fall is already encroaching. The swamp maples are turning and the sun is no longer hot. I'm beginning to think of eating potatoes and soups. Over Labor Day weekend we went canoeing at a lake nearby and I found myself chilled when I attempted to swim. Not that I'm particularly complaining. Fall comes with fresh apple cider and the famed New England foliage.


Habit 5: Expecting to live free or die

Live free or die is the New Hampshire state motto, and unlike other state mottoes, it actually means something. They're (we're?) proud of that motto and the accompanying attitude. The overall political climate is technically conservative libertarian, which essentially means it's full of people with a strong sense of tradition and an even stronger desire to be left alone to do what they like.

And so that's why NH has very loose gun laws, but allows gay marriage.

When I moved to New York state I was very concerned about learning all the new traffic laws. Can I talk on my cell phone? Turn right on red? What about U-turns? And now I'm utterly unconcerned. Of course I can talk on my cell phone while driving. I could text while driving an uninsured car and not wearing my seat belt if I wanted. Do I? Of course not. But I could and that oddly makes a difference. In fact, as far as I can tell the only weird driving law is the one regarding pedestrians.

I find it refreshing to be treated by the government as someone able to make my own decisions. Every time I drive over the Massachusetts state line and see the sign commanding me to "Buckle up" and proclaiming "No texting while driving. It's the law," I feel a little dig at us New Hampshirites, as if we need controlling and reminding that there are laws in Massachusetts.

And related to this...


Habit 6: Paying no sales tax

One weekend my friends and I went down to Connecticut to Connecticon. All of that aside, I made a purchase of what I thought was $18 (3x6=18, right?) and it was rung up at $19 something and my friend Ben and I were both confused and asking if we had misunderstood the price.

It took us a little bit to realize that we had forgotten sales tax.

For everyone's reference, the apparent flip side to this is that the property tax is horrendous here.



And so that's life in New Hampshire. It's apparently full of delicious water, nice summer weather, and an odd assortment of laws. Just to show it's not, here's a four pictures from between the last post and now:

Dariana's first trip to Maine (with Haley, the 14-year-old daughter of the 
family we're staying with) at Nubble Light

Kim, her mom (who was visiting), and a friend near the top of Mt Monadnock

Sparkler shenanigans on the lawn on the 4th of July 

My glasswork. Misshapen flowers, a paperweight and a teeny bubble

Gone East girls go... west? Further east? Where?

Part 1: Answering the question, "Where are you and what are you doing?" 

We'll start by going back to late January.

Kim and I had been having periodic discussions about when to decide that Ithaca wasn't working for us. It was clear that it wasn't, but the question was whether to continue trying to make it work, or to throw in the towel. I think we both knew that it wasn't where we should be and were planning to leave. There was never anything particularly bad about it, but life there felt like getting by instead of the growth and joy that we both wanted from the move. We hadn't settled on what would make us decide to move, but we hoped it would become clear.

This clarity came to us in the form of a library fine--a $94 library fine. We still can't figure out their math. Something like $50 for a book overdue for more than 30 days, the daily fines, and some other mysterious charges. It sounds a bit silly and dramatic to decide to leave over a library fine, but that got us seriously considering it.

Note: the public library system of Tompkin county in New York is not after us. We called them, got it down to $17, and paid it.

Our options were looking like we were going to have to change our blog title (by going back west to Fairfield), but then I got an amazing phone call. It was Ben and DuCiel (who you may remember from our blog post about going to their wedding in October) with the proposal that we could move to New Hampshire with them and another friends of ours from Fairfield. Du's mom owns a company that does magazine distribution, and she apparently was looking to hire someone. So Kim was offered the job, and we were offered Du's old room to stay in. Of course we were hesitant to accept, simply because we both want to avoid being a burden on anyone. After much assurance that we were not going to be trouble and that it was definitely fine, we set our course for farther east. 

We spoke with our landlord, and we agreed that we'd leave at the end of February. So we packed up, Kim left mid-month, then I kept on packing and left on March 1st. Kim had to leave early because she was needed to work. I arrived in New Hampshire at the tail end of a snow storm. I spent my first Saturday sledding, building a snow fort, having a snowball fight, and then playing games by the fire. There was immediately so much more joy than we'd had in Ithaca.

That seems like a nice bow for the end, right? Wrong! That's the bow for the first part.

Part 2: Kim's Job Perks

The Monday after I got to New Hampshire (I arrived on Thursday night), Kim and I went to San Francisco.

I'm sure you're asking why and with what money we traveled all the way across the country? The answer is because part of Kim's job is to travel, and apparently because of the clever use of frequent flier miles, I was invited along. Kim was there for the annual Exceptional Women in Publishing conference. According to her, the women she met there were successful, driven, intelligent women who were completely willing to help out younger women just starting in the industry.

We stayed in an adorable hotel between Union Square and Chinatown. Like many hotels, they had complimentary breakfast. In this case, it involved cloth napkins and a waitress taking our order. Kim and I helped make gift bags on Tuesday morning for the conference. It was a balmy not-wear-a-jacket out, so we walked in the warm sunshine to Union Square to find lunch. We ate Thai food, and then wandered through a large mall just to see what all there was. On Wednesday Kim had the conference, and I had a short jaunt to Chinatown (until I was chased back by sore feet). I did find the supposed best bakery in Chinatown, and we had bubble tea later. The bakery reminded me of being in Beijing, but the bubble tea wasn't as flavorful as I remember.

Our last day, Thursday, was a free day. We took the ferry to Sausalito, and walked around there. I love seeing cities from the water. You get such a good idea of their character. San Francisco has the skyscrapers, but only in a small area and then it's all hills and people-sized buildings. Sausalito was adorable for walking in, but we were so exhausted from jetlag and walking around earlier that we went home early. We ate more delicious Asian food (soup and curry) at a vegan restaurant. I'd never eaten at a strictly vegetarian restaurant with such an extensive menu. It was remarkable to go through pages and pages of options without having to sift through for a few dishes I would order.

On Friday we went home to New Hampshire. We arrived to a light snow shower and friends picking us up. It was good to be back.